About Relationships

Have you though about what is stopping you from approaching women?

I would hazard a guess that one reason men hesitate in approaching women is that they have a deep down fear of rejection.

We all want to be accepted and liked and popular, but the world doesn’t work that way.

If the one thing that is stopping you from going up to that gorgeous woman and talking to her is your fear that she will reject you, then there is only one thing to do:

Expect rejection.

I want you to expect that when you go up to that woman she probably is not going to give you her phone number. And that is OK.

What you need to do is change your goal. If you change the game plan so that the goal is not to get a woman’s phone number, you area already ahead of the game.

Here is what your new goal will be: Your new goal is to successfully go up and have a conversation with a woman. Period. Nothing else. It can only be for five minutes. It can last for 2 hours. The goal is to go talk to a woman and that is it.

You can succeed at this goal. I know you can. It is not about getting a phone number. It is about having a conversation.

The main point I am trying to make is one that all of us need to learn at some point or other in our lives – we have no control over other people or how they react to what we say or do. The only control we have is over ourselves. We can only control what we say and do. If someone, say a woman, chooses to respond to us in a way we like, then that is great. But if a woman chooses to respond in a way we don’t like, well, guess what? That is fine, as well.

The key to successfully approaching a woman is to not make a big deal about it. After all, your goal is to talk to a woman for a few minutes or however long. It is not about meeting you future wife (though that may be a result) or about getting a date for Saturday night (again, that may happen), but the goal is to simply talk to a woman for a few minutes.

If you truly believe this and make this your goal, you will automatically give off an attitude of confidence and nonchalance. You will seem like the kind of guy who goes up and talks to women just for the heck of it, because guess what? You do.

This will actually be more appealing than you can imagine to a woman. Women are used to men approaching them wanting something 100 percent of the time. If you just approach her, have a conversation and leave, she will be intrigued.

I’m not saying that if you see her continue looking at you that you shouldn’t go back and get her number of maybe you’ll see her again at another time. The point is you have accomplished your goal and became a man of intrigue at the same time.

Bill has been studying How to Approach Women for the last 5 years in NYC and is a pick up artist who can help you learn to do the same. The original article can be found here: What Stops You From Approaching Women?.

When I was fourteen, my family was new in town and I started attending a church youth group absolutely stocked with beautiful, beautiful girls to my fourteen year old eyes. When interacting with them, the one constant theme was, “I don’t know what to do.” So I either did nothing or did something reasonably stupid. This pattern continued with little development well into my college years. That’s it. I just didn’t know what to do. I was afraid, but I was afraid primarily because I didn’t know what to do. I desperately wanted many girls over the years to be interested in me. I was a “serial crusher”, one girl or another would grab my interest, and I usually knew her socially, but I just didn’t know what to do. I was eighteen before it really even occurred to me that I could just ask a girl out.

It’s a painful feeling, not knowing what to do. You want something, and you know you want it but see absolutely no way of getting it. Of course, it was more complex, many factors associated with just general awkwardness and maturity were there, but I didn’t seem to be “growing out of it”. A “phase” doesn’t last for years. When I discovered my first “How to Talk to Women” book, it was amazing. Now I did know what to do. A funny thing happened, it worked. At least for a while, and then the next book worked for a while, and the next. Now at this point I could give some trite line like, “I learned to just be myself, and they worked because I believed in myself,” or some other useless drivel, but I won’t. What all of these books gave me was something that was true, even if not completely true, because it did work. They did help me because “I believed in myself,” but more importantly they helped me see a self I could believe in. They all helped me know what to do.

What to do is this. ACTE: Assess the Situation, Create a Simple Plan, Take Action, and Evaluate. I didn’t invent this and have to give credit to an ex-Navy SEAL author named Richard Machowicz, although he didn’t invent this either, but I heard it first from him. I think its powerful because, whether I called it this at the time or not, it was the process I was following. What the books and experience of others helped give me was an understanding of their ACTE processes and what worked and what didn’t. What the Christian authors I was also reading helped give me was a greater understanding about the nature of men and women in general in a way that provided real standards to shoot for and why. If you follow this plan, it will get you closer to your goal. It will require some discipline to stick to it, but as long as you’re not always willfully weak ignorant or malicious, you will not only get closer to some far off hazy goal, but actually feel better before, during, and after your contacts with women.

Assessing the Situation is basically opening your eyes up to what’s going on, noticing your surroundings, your current mood, and the mood of the girl you have in mind, indicated by her body language and a kind of animal sense we all possess in noticing how others around us are feeling. You also have a clear goal in your mind, ultimately its marriage, but you have to meet her and date her first (or court if you prefer the term). Creating a simple plan and taking action means do the best you know at the time. You know doing nothing won’t work, so just take a second to think and then do what seems best. As long as its not overtly immoral, just do it.

Evaluate is a little more tricky and is the absolute crux, its where most people fall short and wind up failing. It means taking an honest look at what happened afterwards whether it went successfully or not. For example, there was a time when I thought I was being successful because I got a ton of numbers, but since these numbers ended up not panning out, I was missing the fact that, even though she gave me her number, she didn’t seem that excited about the prospect at the time. Also, even if you did everything right based on your experience and the experiences of others but it didn’t work with a particular girl, you know that what you had was not necessarily a bad plan. Evaluate. See the good and bad and make a note. So the next time you Create a Simple Plan, it will be based on a clearer view of Assessing the Situation and figuring out your options.

Over time, your knowledge of what works and what doesn’t will get clearer and more readily accessible. Just exercising your faculties of judgement and courage will have a great masculinizing effect and make you feel better about the whole process. If you ACTE, you will always know what to do.

Michael Dyer teaches Christian men about dating and relationships. He writes regularly on Christian dating advice at www.AquinasOnDating.com.

Since the beginning of time, in nearly every romance story, the hero gets the girl. The only problem is, I haven’t seen many dragons lately, unless you count the alligators in the bayou near my house, and honestly they’re not bothering anyone as a general rule. We all know courage is intimately bound up with winning a woman’s heart, but the problem is either we don’t know exactly how to be courageous, or the idea we have of courage is something that can’t be practically demonstrated in front of a girl unless you’re someone like a firefighter. And even in that case, there has to be a fire going on right then.

The truth is, courage is simpler than you think. Once you grasp its true nature, you will see that not only do opportunities for courage abound, but that it has been an intimate part of your life for a long time. Courage has the word couer as its root, the French word for heart. We all have times where we do something “heartily”, where you really throw yourself into something. Whether its playing sports or playing video games, we have all habitually done some things heartily.

If you call to mind what it’s like and observe it; it’s a time where the transition between noticing something (the placement of the ball or hearing approaching zombies) and acting on it is smooth and fast. Your actions may not always pay off, but as long as you’re really into what you’re doing they pay off more often than not. And when you’re playing really well, you know intuitively when to think and when to act so that you don’t just rush around to no benefit, and you don’t miss opportunities while you’re standing and thinking. The exact same thing happens when dealing with women. When you hold back, when you don’t let your spirit rise up and forward, she senses this, if even only on an animal level. But when you are not holding back, she notices this too. And if you’re not even afraid where most other guys are, she notices that too.

The process is this: knowledge always comes first, then judgement, and then action. Knowledge, in some ways can’t really be stopped. Your mind is powerful and is sensing gigantic amounts of information even when you’re not consciously choosing to think about it. Judgement is when you decide what to focus on. Good judgement means respecting knowledge, and where you go wrong is bad judgement, when you ignore what you know. Action is the follow up.

Here is how bad judgement usually happens: You know you want to get married eventually. You know a certain girl interests you. And you know that being passive doesn’t work. Bad judgement usually happens when you start ignoring these things. Good judgement dictates that you take action because nothing will ever really happen with a woman unless you take action. Then, you observe the result of your action. Either the girl wasn’t interested, in which case you should probably stop doing that and try something else. Or she was interested, in which case you can file that away as a nugget that will probably work again in the future.

But typically, we don’t follow our judgement and get solid real-world experience. We want to wait until we have a real feeling of certainty that she is interested. From my own experience, if that feeling ever arrives, it turns out to be false. Instead of simply acting and seeing the result, we wait and wait, anticipating that a positive result will come on its own without having to put ourselves on the line at all. This is the very opposite of courage.

This is why courage is a virtue. It is a muscle and exercising it becomes easier, but it always takes a little push at the start before your feelings line up with taking action. Just like on a rollercoaster, you never really feel like starting out until you have already gone over the first hill. Courage not only moves you toward your goal, but it also provides the benefit of making you feel stronger and better whenever you exercise it; however, all the benefits only come after you do it.

Michael Dyer teaches Christian men about dating and relationships. He writes regularly on Christian dating advice at www.AquinasOnDating.com.

Whether you are married or simply dating, a romantic weekend away can be a wonderful idea if you are looking to do something a bit different. All it takes is a little careful forward planning to make sure that the experience is as enjoyable as possible for you and your partner.

The most important part of organising your weekend away is to plan ahead. You will need to decide on where you would like to go and what you would like to do when you get there. If you are planning on travelling a significant distance then remember to anticipate how long it will take to get there so that you can make the most of your time once you arrive. Have you decided whether you’ll be spending some quiet quality time together or will you be doing something that more people are likely to enjoy? These are all things for you to consider when it comes to planning ahead.

The next thing that you need to think about is the cost. Do you have the budget to spoil yourself with a luxury weekend getaway or are you looking to do something special on a more modest budget? It’s far from necessary to spend an excessive amount on a weekend away however you may need to factor in the cost of travel if you are likely to be driving a long way or buying a plane ticket. Also take into consideration the cost of your accomodations as well as how much spending money you will allow yourself. It doesn’t matter whether you are looking to plan a simple weekend away or a more lavish affair, it is always important to keep track of your expenses.

Just like moving house, the most important part of your getaway will be location, location, location. You may wish to get as far away as another country or it could be somewhere as near as a pleasant area in your home town. Again, this should be entirely dependent on your budget, time constraints and of course what you and your partner find enjoyable.

On that note, what do you think your partner would like to do on this romantic getaway? This is especially important as if you are planning on having a romantic weekend away then you need to consider something that both you and your partner will enjoy. For example you wont want to consider a ski getaway if your partner cant stand the cold! Sit down with your partner and draw up a list of what you both enjoy and you are sure to find something that you will both get something out of.

Don’t forget to take accessories. After all, a weekend getaway wont be romantic unless you have something that displays your romantic side. It’s always a safe bet to take a bottle of wine and roses. Perhaps if you are looking to spice things up a little then you or your partner may wish to bring some sexy lingerie or sensuous oils. The only limit is your imagination and creativity but as always, make sure that it is something that both you and your partner can enjoy.

Dave Matthews is writing on behalf of Kettering Park Hotel, one of Northamptonshire’s leading luxury country hotels.

Maybe your ex invites you to coffee. Maybe they act flirty. Maybe they call you up more often and seem interested in spending more time with you. It’s almost like they’re approaching you the way they did before the two of you were in a serious relationship. If you notice that your ex is sending you mixed signals, you may be asking yourself, “Does my ex want to get back with me”?

If your ex is sending out these vibes, it’s quite likely they’re interested in you and might even want to get back together. But even if you’re still in love with your ex, it’s better if you don’t run back into their arms right away. You’ll get a better response if you play hard to get… within reason, of course! See, if you get back together with your ex too quickly, you may find yourself being pushed away again. Look at it this way: Your ex hasn’t been with you for a while. People tend to want things that are just beyond their grasp, and the fact that you don’t “belong” to your ex anymore is probably what contributed to their renewed interest in the first place.

You probably know the old saying, absence makes the heart grow fonder. It’s only natural that you and your ex will start missing each other, or at least certain aspects of the relationship you shared. After all, even if your relationship was a rocky one, you no doubt shared some wonderful experiences and have a lot of good memories. You were also familiar and comfortable with each other–knew each other’s moves, quirks, favorite positions, favorite foods, favorite shows, etc. It takes a lot of work, patience, and commitment to build up a new relationship to that level again, which is yet another reason why your ex might want to get back together with you. If you’re here wondering, “Does me ex want to get back with me?”, chances are good your ex is asking the same question.

Be warned, however: Your ex might be playing games with you. It’s not unheard of for people to exact “revenge” for perceived wrongs by leading on their exes and making them think they have a chance, only to break their heart again. Alternatively, an ex might feel lonely or insecure, see no other prospects, and decide to pass the time with you… not because he or she really wants to get back with you, but because you’re convenient. That’s why it’s so important not to make any quick decisions, even if you’re pretty sure your ex is interested in you.

Even if you’re anxious to find a concrete answer to the question, “Does my ex want to get back with me?”, don’t obsess over it. Now is the time to stand back, read the signals, and get a feel for the situation before you take any action. And think of it this way: If your ex is serious about getting back with you, it won’t hurt to play hard to get (within reason). It will intrigue them and make them yearn for you even more, and it will also protect you from getting your heart broken again if it turns out your ex isn’t seriously interested in getting back with you after all.

Get your ex back right now! Visit http://takingbackmyex.blogspot.com/ to learn more.

Come on! It’s normal, first dates have never been easy especially for people whose social skills were not developed. They were not exposed to many different cultures and social environments. According to psychology experts first date jitters can be avoided if only the right timing taken into consideration when planning a date and of course choosing the right person to date.

A few questions can help a person determine if he or she is dating right. First, is there enough information to gauge the person’s personality? This question can be a guide on what kind of date can be made. Second, was there ever a chance to meet the person either by talking on the phone or meeting in person prior to the date? Contrary to blind dates, having a first date with someone known already lessen the nervousness. Third, is there a way to know what the other person feel about the whole dating thing? At least, this gives an idea if the two first daters share the same feeling of anxiety. And lastly, is this date being pursued to relax and enjoy? The two must know what their main objective for the date is.

There should be a bird’s eye view about the date. It is important to know if the person to be dated is authentic right before jumping into the dating wagon. Know the person’s background. A little research won’t hurt. Break the ice by phoning the person a few hours before the exact date. Ask her if she’s ready or if she wants the planned dating place. It may not tell what the person exactly is but it could broadly give light about the personality.

Knowing this, can give an idea on what sort of topic can be discussed on the actual date. Just be honest and give the person the benefit of doubt. Think of her or him as as anxious and as honest. This creates more confidence for both. See to it that the dating place selected has been agreed and not just the other’s preference. It must be a place where there is enough lighting and with several other people dining if it’s a restaurant. This ensures safety for both.

Accept the fact that it might not go well as planned or expected so both must choose a less expensive place. So if the date is not a good match, at least not too much cash was spent.

Here are tips for dating green lights:

- The reason it is important to know the venue where the date will be is for wearing the appropriate clothing. Can’t expect heels on a ball game, right?

- Make oneself exciting.

- As an appetizer, try to share three personal special things to break the ice.

- Want some compliment? Start giving him or her compliments. Oh yeah!

- For guys, please drink moderately; avoid getting drunk for goodness sakes!

- Say thank you always, appropriately and on the right time okay.

- Never hesitate to talk. But talk with sense. Nobody likes to be with a person with – - nothing between his or her ears.

- Show interest by gazing into his or her eyes. Do this on special moments like when he – or she laughs, kept quiet, or plain being flirty.

- Compatibility is not made but discovered. Continue research about the person by asking questions, first in general and getting a bit personal. But make sure the questions are not offending.

- And when asking questions, see to it that ethics are present. Know his or her values right from the start.

- If the date was okay, don’t be shy to tell that it was a good time. It could be an invitation for the next date.

- Thank each other for taking some time for the date.

But watch out for the red light as well:

- Never exaggerate the real you.

- Never mention anything about the Ex.

- Both are dating to get to know each other, so please don’t flirt with the other girls or guys during the date.

- Know when to talk and when to shut up. Give each other chance to share something.

- Don’t expose everything private on the first date.

Dating is fun. But nothing is more exciting than going to a first date. Just enjoy and have fun!

Dating Support Center (http://www.datingsupportcenter.com) offers dating tips and advice for men and women.

Breaking up could be a hard task to initiate especially with a girlfriend. There are circumstances that can be so difficult to decide on like when could be the right time to say those hurting words to the girl. A guy might come up deciding to break up when he feels that there is no more love present between them.

Sometimes the reason why men have a hard time breaking up is that he may remember those times that they spent happy moments together. The foundation of their relationship, which is love, may no longer be present but he may still care for the girl for some reasonable good intentions.

Breaking up can cause too much pain on both parties, especially on the part of the girl. The emotional damage it brings allows a man to be more cautious in breaking up. These can be factors to postpone his plans and set a new day to say what he feels. There could be some ways to be nicer where she would understand and would let him go peacefully.

The guilt is always present when a man breaks up with his girl. The man may regret all those things that he had promised. The sad part may come if the man did not fulfill any of those promises. Sometimes a person can never tell when the time comes that he no longer experience the same excitement and thrill they used to have in the relationship. This may lead on to deciding to move on and probably find another girl that would give him the spark that he once had with his previous love.

It is not easy to escape when breaking up with someone who does not expect any sudden decisions. Some men may just ignore the girl, but that action is not enough for a formal break up because there are no disclosures that have happened. This option may not be advisable because this can hurt the girl even more and the emotional damage that it may cause on her part.

Here are some ways that may help a person on how he can break up and have a graceful exit:

1. Remember that being honest to her could make her calmer about the thoughts of breaking up. Tell the girl the true reason in coming up with this kind of decision. In this way, she may realize that there could be a reason for breaking up with her. Telling the truth is the best way to explain the reason of the break up. A man can build up his integrity and dignity with that girl for being honest and true.

2. Remember that a man should break up with his girl in person. Do not attempt to initiate the plan through phone and mail. Personally tell her the decision and be man enough to say the lines face to face. Some coward men tend to deliver their messages through their close friends. This act can degrade the credibility and integrity that a person has built on the girl she used to love.

3. Show some signs that would give him the idea that there is something wrong in the relationship. Lessen the time that is being allotted to her. This may initiate some confrontations and questions from the girl why the guy seems to be colder and dry.

4. If there are confrontations that may happen, be composed and let her bring out her emotions. These instances are just normal on the girl’s part because it is the guy who initiated the break up. There should be no guilt from a guy’s part to show the girl that there is sincerity with his break up. Sometimes it is uncomfortable to show no remorse at all in these kinds of situations.

5. A person may invite the girl to go out for dinner or lunch. If possible, bring the girl to the places where there are special moments that have been memorable. This may help the girl to get over the break up easily because she may remember those happy and enjoyable moments together.

After breaking up with the girl, make sure to the girl some time to let her heal the wounds. For sure, she might keep some anger to the man who broke her heart. Remember not to bring back any communication to the girl. It may seem hard but this could be the best way to do after the break up.

Dating Support Center (http://www.datingsupportcenter.com) offers dating tips and advice for men and women.

There are a thousand and one ways of meeting girls. Guys who want to meet new girls for friendship or for any reason should look for girls in places where they always hang around.

Girls can be found in the library, supermarket, parking lot, restaurant, shops and similar places. They usually hang around in places where they can meet their friends and have fun. If you want to pick up girls in a surrounding that is generally friendly and harmless, then there is nowhere to go but the malls.

Malls are one of the in things to meet friends these days because of the convenience it offers to everyone. It is a one stop shop area for those who want to hang around or do some shopping. There are many girls in the mall including girls who work in the various shops or girls just hanging out or doing their thing.

Specific areas in the mall where one can pick up girls

Parking lot

The mall parking lot is a good place to pick up girls. It is the first place you go to when you go to a mall. Girls who are about to go shopping or hang inside the malls have to go the parking area first before getting inside. Those who are finished with their shopping will also have to go to the parking lot to get their cars.

Be decent when picking up girls especially in the parking lot as you may be mistaken for jack the ripper. Most girls avoid males who converse with them openly in parking lots despite not knowing them. If you want to be taken seriously, try pick up lines that would not offend girls. Look for ways to comment on her car. If you are lucky and you are observant, you can tell her she forgot to put off her light or any similar lines.

Supermarket

The supermarket is the most likely place where you can pick up girls. On weekends, you can go there anytime you like because single girls generally buy their groceries during weekends. You can also visit the mall supermarket during weekdays, particularly during lunch breaks. This might be a little awkward since girls usually hang out with friends and you just have to be smart enough to get past her friends and get to know her name and contact number.

You can hit two birds at the same and make your girl hunting less obvious by buying some groceries yourself. Girls like men who know how to cook and you can always use your cooking skills to impress them. Or if you are not a good cook, then you can use it by asking the girl next to you about the other things that you should buy if you want to cook pasta. A good conversation can start from their and who knows, you might get so lucky and get to take her home for dinner.

Food court

You will surely meet girls in the food court or other restaurant inside the mall. The ideal time to meet them is during lunch time as they are sure to go there by themselves or with some friends to take a bite. Food courts are generally filled with people during these hours so why not share a table with a friendly gal or two? You can start a conversation while eating lunch. This would be advantageous for you since girls will think it safe and natural to talk to whomever they are breaking bread with.

Bookstore

If you love books then go to the mall bookstore and try to pick up not just a book but also a girl. Girls love going to bookstores if only to buy pens, trinkets, pocketbooks, notebooks and other things. You can browse over some books and start a conversation with a girl near you who is also looking at the same kind of books.

If you see a girl browsing over a paperback of Dan Brown’s Da Vinci Code or any other author, then you can tell her how interesting the book is and how it has kept you up in one night.

Coffee shop

Girls go to coffee shops not just for their specialty coffee but to be seen. Girls hang out at coffee shops like Starbucks and Seattle’s Best to hang around with their friends and also to meet new friends. This might be an opportune time not only to drink coffee but also to pick up girls.

Dating Support Center (http://www.datingsupportcenter.com) offers dating tips and advice for men and women.

It can be so sad when it feels like your romantic relationship isn’t working out. Let’s face it: relationships are tough! It isn’t easy to always get along with the man or woman you love. But “the end” doesn’t have to be the answer. Try these 5 tips for fixing a broken relationship and see just how well your romantic relationship improves. You may be surprised at how quickly thing improve when you make a conscious effort to repair your broken bond.

Every Relationship Needs Good Communication. This may sound kind of simple and we bet you are nodding your head right now. But do you know what it takes to have good communication skills? A delicate balance of both listening and talking. Taking the time to tell your romantic partner just how you are feeling and what is going on in your life. Then also spending just as much time listening to their reaction to what you have said – or listening to them tell you how they feel or what is going on in their life.

Communication experts have been known to say that “listening is not simply waiting for your turn to talk.” That probably makes you smile because you realize that’s what some people do. Give your partner your full attention when you listen to them.

Embark on Self Improvement. If your ex has complained about your bad habits or lack of motivation, now is a good time to show them you care enough to try and change. Simply taking the initiative to improve in these areas could easily attract your ex right back into your arms. When people offer you advice it makes them feel good when you respond positively to it. Even if you have trouble breaking bad habits your partner will appreciate the effort.

Try Walking a Mile in Their Shoes. This is a very old saying about understanding and compassion. Both of these traits are critical to having a good relationship with anyone – not just a romantic relationship. If your ex boyfriend or girlfriend is angry with you for something they say you have done – stop for a moment, control your defensiveness, and try to see things from their point of view.

Could you – in their perspective – have done something? Look from their point of view. Can you begin to understand why they are unhappy? This is not to excuse them for treating you poorly or getting angry at your for no reason. Use this exercise to help you understand that your ex deserves your compassion and understanding. They say you really do understand someone after you’ve walked a mile in their shoes.

Get a Makeover. One of the best things you can do to improve your relationship with your ex is to increase your confidence. Suffering through a broken relation can have an adverse effect on you self confidence. You can become full of anxiety, start to doubt yourself, and start to focus too much on the “worst case scenario”. You can boost your self esteem with a trip to the mall or the salon for an instant makeover. Sometimes spending a little money on yourself can turn back those negative thoughts. And turning a few heads in the process will make you feel even better!

Try Apologizing. Some of you may be scratching your heads at this one – especially if you think the other person is in the wrong. But taking the first step of apologizing can help a broken relationship heal. It doesn’t have to mean that you are wrong and they are right – it simply means that you are sorry things have ended up this way.

If you want your ex back and for things to change it is important to meet them halfway. Your apology and heartfelt intentions to work things out can go a long way. If you apologize – chances are that they will apologize to. This can be an excellent start to working together to improve your relationship.

Why do some breakups last forever but others reunite? The secret is in the way you approach the situation. In order to get your ex back for good you have to reignite the attraction between you. Find out how at GetBackMyEx.com

In the dark, dismal and confounding universe of ‘Singles and Dating’, it’s true that good looks can get you a long, long way, but it is confidence that will give you that extra oomph and catapult you and some lucky person to the stars and beyond.

There is nothing more appealing than a person who looks and acts like he knows exactly what he’s doing. Confidence is sexy. It is the arrow that cupid shoots off; it is that certain something in ‘je ne sais quoi’; it gives people the illusion that you are all that even though in reality, you are not really a lot, and perhaps, even missing some.

But nobody has to know. Learn to strut like you’ve got the stuff!

People who have lack of confidence when dating often fall into the trap of over analyzing things, thus, building up stream-loads of stress. Dwelling on such negative thoughts reflects on the person and his behavior which is a big turn off. Instead of basking in insecurities, adjust your lens towards the positive aspects. Confidence is key. Confidence allows a person to be himself and even blossom into a beautiful social butterfly.

Unfortunately, it is not something that can be bought from the your favorite 24-hour convenient store. But don’t fret, squirt. There are easy-to-follow steps to be taken to help boost your feeble confidence. If you follow these few simple tips, your special someone will be eagerly knocking on your door in no time, begging for a second date.

Few Simple Tips:

1. Dress your best but still be comfy. True, looking good will make you feel nice but overdoing it may cause major disasters. Remember, no need to slaughter innocent animals (particularly, swans) to look gorgeous. Wear something that you will look splendid in but comfortable enough to move around and be cute in.

2. No fidgeting. Stop worrying if your chubby belly is showing or if the toupee is positioned right. You don’t want to miss your date’s charming little attempts to flirt with you while you’re busy rearranging the placement of your necktie.

3. Good conversation can make all the difference. Be engaging and be spontaneous. You can prepare topics beforehand but don’t force it if it’s not right. The best conversations are usually unpremeditated. Just go with the flow and be yourself.

4. Remember it takes two to converse. Listen to what your date is saying and be genuinely interested. Avoid lying. It will end up biting you in the derriere in the future.

5. Stop obsessing about the way you look. Don’t kill yourself worrying about other people’s opinion of you. It’s purely and utterly useless. You can’t control what your date thinks. Just be your cute and loveable self. True confidence is the courage to be who you really are without apologies.

6. Flirt, enjoy, and then, flirt some more. Don’t be afraid to act silly and don’t hold back on compliments.

7. Confidence breeds confidence and a good atmosphere. If you feel good about yourself, even your date will feel good about themselves. Confidences ensures a healthy flow of good feelings.

Note that having confidence does not mean that you have to act like an arrogant nitwit trying to be clever. The other person can usually tell if you’re forcing it. Confidence is not something that you have to go out of your way to display. It shimmers in and by itself. No subtle muscle-flexing whilst pretending to pass the salt during dinner. For the girls, avoid bending over, pretending to pick up every imaginary dime, nickel, and penny you see lying on the ground. And for the love of macaroni and cheese, ladies, no leaning and squeezing!

In the end, it is not the dress, the make up, the neck tie or any outward vesture that makes a person sexy or attractive. It is the wisdom and experiences attained throughout a lifetime which makes you who you are that makes you sexy and attractive. It shows in the way you stand and move and go about everyday things. It’s evident in the self-assured manner in which you present yourself to the world. That is beauty. That is confidence.

Dating Support Center (http://www.datingsupportcenter.com) offers dating tips and advice for men and women.